I knew I could get one more scatological reference into my blog before the end of the week. Freshmen finally forced my hand into a seating chart. I hate seating charts. I teach high school and in my opinion a high school age kid needs to have the minimum amount of self-discipline to be able to sit and work for 30-45 minutes at a crack most….not all, but most of the time. However, once in a while a class comes through that just HAS to have a seating chart.
Yesterday, two of my beloved frosh, decided that they found humor in tossing things out my second floor classroom window. I don’t know why we don’t have screens. I’m sure it’s some sort of code violation, but whatever. I found tossing things out the window hilarious, too. Of course I was about 9 years old at the time and not about to enter drivers’ ed like these upstanding examples of citizenship. How’s that for a scary thought? Some of these kids are already old enough to start on their learner’s permit and will be on the road in a matter of months and yet they still think that writing “boob” upside down on their calculators is the height of comedy.
I digress. I’m a good digresser though. Is “good digresser” an oxymoron?
I had to tell my class that they would be getting a seating chart tomorrow. When they asked why, I told them, “Because throwing pencils out the window and laughing is sorta like monkeys throwing their own poop. Only the monkeys actually find it amusing. Anyone with more intelligence than a monkey just sorta finds it disgusting and annoying.”
And that, dear readers, is my third scatological reference in the last seven days. Dingdingfuckingding. Winnah, winnah, chicken dinnah!